What we call school success is a whole made up of many parts.If these parts are present, it is very rare for the student to experience failure at school and suffer from fear of exam or performance anxiety. If you want to improve your school success then you are going to love this guide.
CONTENTS
- Family Support
- Inner Discipline
- A Clear Goal
- Experiencing the Sense of Success
- Proper Friend Selection
- Self-Confidence
- A Planned and Target-Oriented Life
1.Family Support
Family support is our starting point. As a family, we must first manage to establish a healthy relationship with the child.It is important that we do not give children the impression that they will be loved and appreciated only when they are successful.Although many families do not think that way, unfortunately it makes the child feel this way.This causes the love bond to be broken over time.In this case, the family becomes unable to affect the child. Instead, we should make them feel that we are with the child at every end, and no matter what happens, our love should not be presented as if it depends on success. We must establish a bond with the child outside of duties, show that we care about her emotional world, care about her/his friends and respect her/his ego integrity. In other words, we should approach our children not like a guardian who constantly reminds them of their duties and responsibilities, but as parents who respect their holistic development, emotional world and self-integrity, and give ourr support and attention in every situation consistently.
2.Inner Discipline
Inner discipline is another key concept of school success. So how can you gain inner discipline? We can help the child gain inner discipline with measures such as giving the child appropriate duties and responsibilities, avoiding overprotective attitudes as a parent, supporting the child a lot in order to experience the sense of accomplishment, especially at an early age, and ensuring that he will tolerate the consequences when he disrupts his duties. If you constantly remind your child of her duties and take on some of the things she/he needs to do, you will inadvertently prevent her/him from developing inner discipline.Of course, having good examples in this regard in the family and environment will also contribute to the child in this area.
3.A Clear and Reasonable Goal
A clear goal is also a must for school success. We even have a great formula for this.
The target should be SMART.
So what does that mean? It means that the target should be; Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Reasonable, Timely. In the order they appear in the formula, a target should be specific first. In this sense, “I want to be a great man” is not a goal, but “I want to be an engineer” is a goal. A good goal should also be measurable. While the great man in the first example is subjective and blurred, being engineer on the other hand is a measurable goal. If you become an engineer, everyone will understand that you have reached your goal. Attainable explains that the goal is an achievable goal. In other words, your physical-mental capacity and conditions do not constitute an obstacle to achieve this goal. An example of this is that someone who has a bulky physical structure close to obesity and whose muscle structure is not suitable for sprinting says that I will be the 100 meters world champion. Of course there are countless people achieving many goals that seem unachievable. But our topic is not exceptional people with iron will. Being realistic also means that the target you set is realistic for you and acceptable to the buyers. And finally, your goal should be Timely. It should be clear how long you will reach your goal. An unlimited and uncertain time will definitely lower the child’s motivation. https://www.kigem.com/hedef-belirleme.html
4.Experiencing the Sense of Success
What is meant here? This means that the child develops an identity of success especially in the early developmental stages, that is, the period between the ages of 7-12, which Erikson calls success versus failure or inadequacy. The child creates a success identity when she/he sees that she/he can draw that horizontal line, pick apples, learn reading in the most reasonable time, etc. This gives the child the feeling that she/he can. The more experiences, support and approval of these and similar small successes, the stronger the sense of accomplishment-identity. In the following periods, this success identity always helps and prevents insecurity.
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5. Proper Friend Selection
Appropriate friend selection is also one of the important elements of school success. We can assume that if the child has friends with high adaptability, goals, and family support, at least they will not affect their school success negatively. And as emphasized in that wonderful word, man is really the average of five people around him.
6. Self-Confidence
Self-confidence can be shortly defined as the feeling of “I can”. It is a factor influenced by family, education, life events, perspective on life and positive examples in the environment as well as its genetic dimension. Self-confidence is an area that can be improved with the right interventions and professional help when necessary. The duty of families is to realize and help the child overcome if there is a self-confidence gap.
7. A Planned and Target-Oriented Life
A planned and target-oriented lifestyle will make thing much easier for the child. As emphasized in that beautiful saying, “Winds cannot help a ship that does not know where to go.” In this sense, the plan is a compass that takes the child towards its rota. Being target-oriented means always keeping our goal in mind among all the things we do and never losing our passion for it.
Considering the points above, it is very unlikely that the child will experience problems such as school failure and fear of exams. Lack of enough preparation and support causes performance anxiety. Let’s not forget that;
“There are no unsuccessful children; There are children who are not well guided and supported enough.”
If you think that your child is far from the success she/he deserves, and if you believe that one or more of the above elements should be improved, we, as the optimistic psychology team, are ready to accompany you and your child’s journey to success with all our enthusiasm, optimism and expertise. http://www.iyimserpsikoloji.com/iletisim/