According to TDK(Turkish Language Society) definition of anger is the aggressive response against getting hurt or intimidation “<http://tdk.gov.tr/ >”. Yes, anger is an aggresive reaction that might have very destructive consequences and can be displayed in physical, non-verbal or verbal forms.Not being able to reach what they want, being blocked, expectations not met, feeling of inadequacy, loneliness, being pushed away, being exposed to some injustices or disrespect, feeling that they are not understood correctly are other situations that bring out anger.In addition, some mental illnesses can be the cause of anger.https://www.iremyalugulubil.com/tr/article/desc/46558/ofke-kontrol-bozuklugu.html
We have a society whose mother tongue is violence, not Turkish, and therefore the aggression caused by the settled sense of anger is everywhere; at school, work, home, stadium, traffic and almost all areas of life.
Just like in other emotions, physiological and biological changes occur when we get angry, heart rate and blood pressure increase when we get angry, and levels of adrenaline and noradrenaline, which are stress hormones secreted by the adrenal glands, increase.The unbalanced increase in these hormones, which we call stress hormones, leads to the development of serious problems in our various organs and the functions of these organs.Anger disrupts metabolism and increases sugar level in blood. The majority of patients with diabetes are angry. Other changes include tremors in hands, voice, and facial flushing.
So why are we so angry? Why is our anger management so poor? And how can the anger that spoils our quality of life so much can be overcome? In this article, I want to focus on these issues briefly.
Angry people are hurt, vulnerable people. Anger is a form of self-preservation for them. These people want to protect themselves by projecting their anger on others, and on the other hand, they want to take revenge of the people / world who hurt them so much. Of course, these people use this way because they have no better instrument to protect themselves. So, because they have no better options. http://drlescarter.com/bookstore/TheAngerTrap“
Feeling worthless and inadequate is at the heart of anger. As can be easily guessed, such people get hurt very quickly, their frustration thresholds are very low and their threat perception is very high. When this is the case, they are more likely to show anger and aggression.
We are also a loveless and insecure society, and this climate of lovelessness is unfortunately very conducive to the germination of anger. Because anger is an emotion that establishes by the realization that love is uncertain and that judgement and humiliation are absolute. An angry person is a pessimistic one who lives with a chronic fear of being deemed worthless. Therefore, the areas where worthlessness, vulnerability, low self-esteem, low self-respect etc. where anger is commonly fed can be easily developed.
So why is our anger management so poor? First of all, our culture is one that approves of the violence caused by hidden and open anger with words such as “Beating comes out of heaven”, “He who does not beat his daughter beats his knee”, “Those who do not come out with advice should be scolded, those who do not understand from getting scolded should be beaten.” Anger is a masculine accessory and privilege almost everywhere in the world, but especially in the Middle East swamp.
Now the good news: anger is a problem that can be easily controlled in certain ways and can be reduced to a level that won’t harm you and others. So anger management is possible and easy.
We can learn to recognize our anger as it occurs, express ourselves respectfully in every situation, add humor to our lives, increase our self-confidence and self-esteem, not surrender to cultural conditioning, and most importantly, if we prefer non-anger, it can both improve our quality of life and make this world a paradise for ourselves and the beloved. We, as the optimistic psychology team, are ready to accompany you in your effort to build a life without rage, with all our knowledge, energy and optimism.You can access other articles we have written to increase your quality of life at https://www.iyimserpsikoloji.com/.